Who Will Be This Year's Winner?

Who will win the 2007 Idle Handy Award?

We Have A Winner!

George Bush Wins Award-- Again

First it was 2003, then 2004, and now as voted by the staff and readers of BloggingPoet.com, President George “Miserable Failure” Bush has again won the 2005 Idle Handy Award for the third year in a row with Guilford County, North Carolina, Republican Party Chairman, Marcus Kindley, AKA: Kindling, coming in a close second.

Local election officals were amazed that a local candinut was able to do so well in a nationwide election. Mister Kindley was unavailable for comment.

Texas Senator Tom “How The Hammer Got Nailed” Delay was disqualified because of illegal campaign contributions. How much was paid to ensure Senator Delay’s disqualification remains unknown.

In what will no doubt be considered one of the most problematic and closest elections in history-- the President won by just 3 votes-- there were hanging chads, malfunctions with electronic voting machines, accusations of bribary and vote fixing, and many missing ballots. When asked about the many problems, BloggingPoet.com Editor-n-chief, Billy Jones, who oversaw the election, said, “Dude, if the government can’t get it right then how can you expect me to do any better? After all, most of the votes came in at the last minute and I had to carry the ballots to the office on my moped. Then Karl Rove and a bunch of Secret Service agents came by with a half gallon of Old Crow. So a few got lost, big deal, they’re still counting in Iraq and their election was weeks ago.”

Attempts to contact the Vice-president were unsuccessful as he was said to be in an undisclosed location. “Hey, wasn’t that the Cheney Monster passed out in the back seat of Karl Rove’s car?” Mister Jones was heard to ask. “Why isn’t he wearing his pants?”

The Idle Handy Award is presented every year to the person(s) who are only in the public eye because they have nothin’ better to do than waste taxpayer dollars or take-up valuable television and radio on-air time, as well as Internet band-width, simply because they exist. The staff and readers of BloggingPoet.com believe that these persons are a waste of the gene pool and that humanity would have been better served had our nominees not ruined the lives and television viewing of millions of people worldwide through their own self-centered existences.

Tag Election Fraud

Time To Cast Your Ballots

Vote For The Winner Of The 2005 Idle Handy Award

It’s time to cast your ballots for the 2005 Idle Handy Award to be given to the person who, as nominated and voted by the staff, contributors, and readers of BloggingPoet.com, most represent persons who are only in the public eye because they have nothin’ better to do than waste taxpayer dollars or take-up valuable television and radio on-air time, as well as Internet band-width, simply because they exist. The staff and readers of BloggingPoet.com believe that these persons are a waste of the gene pool and that humanity would have been better served had our nominees not ruined the lives and television viewing of millions of people worldwide through their own self-centered existences.

This is the third year I’ve hosted this award and this year includes more nominations than ever before. The nominations are as follows:

George Bush, President of the United States of America, affectionately known as “Dubya,” Cowboy, “Miserable Failure"...
Dick Cheney, Vice-president of the United States, also known as “The Cheney Monster.”
Marcus Kindley, Republican Party Chairman, Guilford County, North Carolina affectionately known throughout the Blogosphere as “Kindling.”
Karl “The Man Behind The Curtain” Rove
Senator Tom “How The Hammer Got Nailed” Delay Currently under inditement in Texas
Senator Ted “Build A Bridge To Nowhere” Stevens

Voting begins now and ends Saturday, January 14, 2006. You may leave your votes in the comment section below or if you wish to remain anonymous you may e-mail your votes to idleblogs (AT) yahoo.com (Exchange the “(AT)” for an “@” and remove the spaces. All votes will be tallied and results posted Sunday, January 15, 2006 here at BloggingPoet.com provided there are no problems with the paper-less, electronic balloting systems I’m using to count the votes.

In the event that the courts intervene I’ll have no choice but to declare a winner as I see fit. That’ll teach ‘em!

Remember: This is your chance to set the record straight one and for all by voting for the 2005 Idle Handy Award winner.

Nominations Are Pouring In

2005 Idle Handy Awards “TM”

Okay, so they’re not exactly pouring in but I have gotten a few (okay 3) e-mails from readers who wish to nominate the contestants for the third annual 2005 Idle Handy Award. Thus far the list of contestants contains:

George Bush, President of the United States of America, affectionately known as “Dubya,” Cowboy, "Miserable Failure"...
Dick Cheney, Vice-president of the United States, also known as “The Cheney Monster.”
Marcus Kindley, Republican Party Chairman, Guilford County, North Carolina affectionately known throughout the Blogosphere as “Kindling.”
Karl “The Man Behind The Curtain” Rove
Senator Tom “How The Hammer Got Nailed” Delay Currently under inditement in Texas
Senator Ted “Build A Bridge To Nowhere” Stevens

Does my readership seem slanted to the left? Hopefully, more will be added here.

For those of you who may not know: The various Idle Handy Nominees are those persons who, as nominated and voted by the staff, contributors, and readers of BloggingPoet.com, most represent persons who are only in the public eye because they have nothin’ better to do than waste taxpayer dollars or take-up valuable television and radio on-air time, as well as Internet band-width, simply because they exist. The staff and readers of BloggingPoet.com believe that these persons are a waste of the gene pool and that humanity would have been better served had our nominees not ruined the lives and television viewing of millions of people worldwide through their own self-centered existences.

Nominations may be left in the comments below or via e-mail to idleblogs (AT) yahoo.com Elections will begin on Sunday, January 8th and end at midnight EST on Saturday, January 14th. Barring any problems with the “electronic voting process” the winner will be announced on Sunday, January 15th. 2006.

Previous winners of the 2003 and 2004 Idle Handy Awards include President George W. Bush and President George W. Bush.

The Idle Handy Awards are a Trademark of Billy Jones and BloggingPoet.com.

2005 Idle Handy Award Nominations

It all began in 2003 when the staff and readers of Idle Hands Magazine voted President George W. Bush as the first recipient of the Idle Handy Award. Idle Hands Magazine no longer lives, but as the publisher of Idle Hands Magazine I felt it my duty to continue the Idle Handy Awards here at BloggingPoet.com and in 2004, President George Bush was again the winner.

“What is the Idle Handy Award?” you ask.

The various Idle Handy Nominees are those persons who, as nominated and voted by the staff, contributors, and readers of BloggingPoet.com, most represent persons who are only in the public eye because they have nothin’ better to do than waste taxpayer dollars or take-up valuable television and radio on-air time, as well as Internet band-width, simply because they exist. The staff and readers of BloggingPoet.com believe that these persons are a waste of the gene pool and that humanity would have been better served had our nominees not ruined the lives and television viewing of millions of people worldwide through their own self-centered existences.

The 2005 Idle Handy nominations will begin on January 1, 2006 and voting will be soon after, so give it some thought and get ready to nominate the next winner of the BloggingPoet.com Idle Handy Award.

What? You got something better to do?

are you a winner?

2004 Idle Handy Award

Well the readers have spoken. (That’s you.) While it may be that IdleHandsMag.com is soon to be no more, the Idle Handy Award lives on here at BloggingPoet.com.

“What is the Idle Handy Award?” you ask.


Yeah, it's lame, but read what it's for. The various Idle Handy Nominees are those persons who, as nominated and voted by the staff, contributors, and readers of IdleHandsMag.com, most represent persons who are only in the public eye because they have nothin’ better to do than waste taxpayer dollars or take-up valuable television and radio on-air time, as well as Internet band-width, simply because they exist. The readers of Idle Hands Magazine believe that these persons are a waste of the gene pool and that humanity would have been better served had our nominees not ruined the lives and television viewing of millions of people worldwide through their own self-centered existences.

The winner of the 2003 Idle Handy Award was none other than President George W. Bush who beat out Vice-President Dick Cheney, former President Bill Clinton, former Vice-President Al Gore, and some dude in Australia who set a world-record for hanging himself inside a glass box tied beneath the Sydney Harbor Bridge but forgot to first call the folks from the Guiness Book of World Records. Also nominated was IdleHandsMag.com Publisher, Billy Jones AKA: Billy The Blogging Poet.

Al Gore was quoted as saying, “Damn, robbed again!”

Billy Jones was quoted as saying, “Damn, now I got to get me another trophy!”

Staff and readers of IdleHandsMag.com were free throughout all of 2004 to nominate their choices for the award. Voting was to begin on January 15, 2005, but because of the impending closure of IdleHandsMag.com, and the fact that only one person was nominated in 2004, voting will not take place.

That’s not to say there won’t be a 2004 Idle Handy Award winner. While it might not seem too very democratic a process, there was one nominee and that nominee wins the award.

“So who is it?” you ask.

Ladies and gentleman, as the former publisher of the now-defunct IdleHandsMag.com, it is my duty-- and my pleasure-- to announce that President George W. Bush AKA: the Shrub, AKA: Bushit, AKA: Bushie, was the only nominee and thus the winner of the 2004 Idle Handy Award given to the person who our readers believe exists in the public eye simply because he has nothin’ better to do than to make the rest of the world miserable. That’s right, the Shrub pulls it out again!

Al Gore was quoted as saying... Well actually Al wasn’t asked about the 2004 Idle Handy Nomination.

Billy Jones was quoted as saying, “Thank God, now I don’t have to steal another stupid trophy. Bushie can just use the same one I sent him last year.”

The White house has yet to respond to this year’s or last year’s Idle Handy announcements.

The Idle Handy Award is a trademark of Idle Hands Magazine and Billy Jones. For permissions, please e-mail idleblogs (at) yahoo.com. Thank you.