Pick-A-Nick...Or, A Lesson In Etymology

Inside information has come my way that a local company - who, for legal reasons, shall obviously remain nameless - has been browbeaten by the malingering forces of Political Correctness (yes, it's still alive and well and potent in our humble burg) to rename their annual Company Festivity. No longer is it the "Annual Company Picnic". It now must be rechristened "Family Day".

"Wherefore this alteration of appellation?" you might well be asking. Delighted to explicate...

A rumor that's been circulating since the late 90s - another of those pernicious internet hoaxes - alleges that the etymological derivation of the word "picnic" goes back to a Southern usage - "pick a nigger," i.e. for lynching. Spread a blanket, unload the food hamper, dig that strange fruit swinging from the poplar tree.

However, there is no basis - linguistic or otherwise - for this rumor, which reference to a decent dictionary (the kind that actually explains where words come from...) would quickly dispel. Not to mention a little old thing we like to call "the Internets" after our beloved Commander-in-Chief's usage. Even a quick perusal of something as basic and oft-used as Wikipedia will reveal this error. Snopes also has a page on it.

So - while it's perfectly delightful that the new name is family-values oriented - it seems that with a modicum of backbone and the gumption for a little research, the thin-skinned and 100% fact-free forces of the Thought Police could have been thwarted. Knuckling under to knee-jerk reactionaries does no one any good - except for the self-righteous satisfaction of the aforementioned dimwits - and continues the degradation of the English language best apotheosized in this quote from an MTV show (nameless here for evermore), "If only she, like, liked you..."

Nuff said.